Another reminder that my friends are all big stupid jerks
LIKE, I LAUGHED. AND THEN I STARTED TO CRY. BECAUSE IT’S TRUE.
SO TRUE IT HURTS TOO MUCH
After playing Sims 3 for several hours without saving (my first mistake, I know) my Sims shit utterly HIT THE FAN. My single mother of five was grilling hot dogs when she suddenly stopped to age up to Elder. I watched in horror as she danced around next to the barbecue as it burst into flames, her entire family excitedly standing around to watch her grow up. Fortunately, the firefighters made it quickly and put out the fire…. only for the message “Mia wonders why it’s gotten so dark” to appear in the corner. I was pretty confused about that, until an enormous meteor landed on my ENTIRE FAMILY (who had been conveniently gathered together by the aging up & the fire) and killed everyone except my toddlers in their cribs, who were promptly taken by social services.
I sat there staring blankly at my screen for a few minutes after that.
it’s ok loki
it’s not like you’re related to them, anyway
oh my god I am dying
#IN THE AAAAAARMS OF THE ANGELS #hi i’m sarah maclaughlan #and will you be an angel for a helpless actor? #every awards season leo dicaprio is abused beaten and neglected by various film board associations #and he’s crying out for an award#please call the number on your screen #and join the ‘get leo an award of some kind at least a participation ribbon or something’ fund #for just PENNIES A DAY #you can help get him some kind of trophy or perhaps a shoe spray-painted gold or something #call or join within the next 30 minutes and you’ll receive this welcome kit #complete with a photo of leo dicaprio doing some acting or philanthroping or whatever it is that he does nowadays#right now he’s sitting at an award gala saying ‘i need an award’ #and your call says ‘i know but honey you just have to stop being in such awful films’ #please call #right now